Hey Harvey!

Posted on Mar 11th 2010 at 05:31:05 AM by (slackur)
Posted under Sony Move, Gaming, PS3, More reasons gamers are single

Slackur, you most certainly didn't ask, what are your opinions of Sony's newly announced (er, named) 'Move' motion controller?

*stares blankly at Dance Dance mats, Wii balance board, Rock Band drum kit, Playstation Eye, Playstation Eyetoy, Gamecube bongos, various plastic guitars, Odyssey 2's The Voice, Virtual Boy, NES Power Pad, Zapper (new and old), various Wii remotes, nunchucks, and classic controllers, Beatmania controllers, Dreamcast mics and keyboards, Taiko drum master, 360 live vision camera, various console mice, SNES Super Scope, Genesis Menacer, Master system 3d glasses, and the Xbox Silent Scope Sniper Rifle literally littering the space between my living room and utility closet*

Eh.  Good for them.  I'll try it after a price drop or on sale. 

Now I'm not a motion control hater, or one of those 'Wii doesn't count as a next generation console' fanboys.  I may hate waggle, but the Wii reintroduced light gun games to the mainstream, one of my favorite genres.  I still enjoy the challenging and competitive simplicity of Wii Sports and Resort.  Raving Rabbids and Wario showed how hilariously fun well done multiplayer party games can be with motion control.  Despite being a port, Okami showed worthwhile gameplay enhancements.  Metroid Prime Trilogy, Dead Space: Extraction, Trauma Center, and Silent Hill used intuitive and immersive controls that helped develop atmosphere.

My vote for the best use of the Wii remote? 

Boom Blox.   An incredibly fun single and multiplayer experience that completely requires Wii's (previously unique) controller.  This critical darling failed at retail, yet it was the best case to me for what Nintendo was going for; experiences unachievable by conventional controller methods, while leveling the playing field so anyone could learn to play with ease.

Not shaking my stupid plastic wand to jump or hit something.

I love my Wii for those exclusive experiences, along with around twenty or so others that don't rely so much on new control methods.  But the Wii has been on the market for several years now, and there are very few games that pull off the requirement of motion control to sell the experience like Boom Blox or even Wii Sports.

The Move has more accuracy, better graphics, and a cool color-changing snowcone controller.  But to what end?  The Wii's biggest fault for me is not the absence of these things (though I'd rather have the rainbow snowcone than better graphics.)  The problem is that the Wii has more proof-of-concepts than new gameplay experiences.  I don't want the same light-gun, pull-the-bow-and-arrow, and steering wheel in space experiences I've done all those many times already.  Prettier pictures and more responsiveness aren't going to justify the presence of another set of sticks my kids think change the TV channel.

Oh, I'll see some games I'll want to play eventually.  Nothing they've shown so far looks very breakthrough to me, but I know I'm a sucker.  I buy everything with the word 'Halo' in it despite knowing exactly what I'm getting; an experience whose core hasn't changed much since Wolfenstein 3D.  I still enjoy them. 

(btw.  When purchasing everything with the word Halo in it, you don't end up with as many religious books as you'd think.  You even end up with some Nine Inch Nails.)

If Sony wants to sell me on its new "forget we shipped without rumble, made fun of you for wanting it, then shipped with it after we settled our lawsuits" technique, they have to show me what new thing they are doing with it.

I actually have to give MS credit here, because the Milo demo showed me a new and interesting direction for motion control (Seaman and Hey You! Pikachu mixed with EyePet through a hype-mode Molyneux filter.)  There are rumors that the protos have lag issues, but even if the final product ships requiring one to douse themselves in molasses so the HAL electronic eyes can keep up , if there is something new to experience beyond popping virtual bubbles and pretend-punching the screen, I'm in.

But if Sony, and later Microsoft with Natal, are going to go anywhere with these newfangled air-guitar imitators, we need to see why we NEED them in the first place.

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So far they've announced a SOCOM,a series that will have a long way to go to wash the terrible experience I had with the last PS3 game,

The Shoot (really?!  I thought they got over one simple word game title/explanations after A2600's Race, Slots, Gopher, Dolphin, Skiing, Golf, Basketball, Baseball, Backgammon, Bowling, Boxing, Tennis, Soccer, Adventure, Combat, Kangaroo, Karate, Maze, Chase, Checkers, Stampede, and Gorf.)  Any interest I had in this game I lost after finding out that in order to activate bullet-time, you have to twirl like a ballerina.  Not even my Wii asks me to pirouette.  Well, only two games.

Move Party: (really?!  I thought we got past the two-word simple game titles from the A2600 era like Video Chess, Word Zapper, Tank-Plus, Star Ship, Sky Diver, Ice Hockey, Dodge 'em, Laser Blast, Laser Gates, Chopper Command, Jungle Hunt, Arcade Golf, Double Dunk, Fishing Derby, Skeet Shoot, Video Pinball, Video Olympics, Submarine Commander, Yar's Revenge, etc.)  Anyway, another party game.  Might be fun, but I have more of these than 16-bit platformer clones.

Sports Champions:  Sports Resort HD?  Actually could be fun, but not my idea of a system seller.

Motion Fighter:  If you knew my BMI, you'd know why I press buttons instead of throw real punches.  Actually, because of my BMI I should probably throw real punches instead of pressing buttons.  I've noticed that anything more complex than Wii Boxing for fighters tends to loose accuracy because of the complexity of motion.  Even if they get past that, it seems limited for me since I play fighters for 2 player competition, and as some Wii games have taught, its rather awkward for both of us to face the screen and fake fight.  I'll keep watching.

And now they've already announced the first Wii port-over: Aragorn's Quest, a game I didn't really have any interest in for the Wii.

So far, not too interested.  But I'll wait and see.
Ignoring your entire entry, I think you should see this.

Peter Molyneux's twitter:  http://twitter.com/pmolyneux

Probably the funniest thing I've ever read.  He seems incredibly absent-minded and sometimes, unprofessional.  Enjoy!

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