The AbyssThe Abyss

Posted on Apr 1st 2010 at 04:00:00 AM by (TraderJake)
Posted under Site News, Zombie Generation, Database of the Undead

MIKE FOX! YOU THOUGHT IT WOULD BE EASY DIDN'T YOU?

Forcing me to hand the site over to you wasn't cool. Driving to Maryland shortly after and bludgeoning me so that I couldn't reclaim it was even worse.

What... what you didn't know is that I didn't just die. Rather, I joined the legion of the undead. Those random forum posts were me from beyond the grave. I thought for a while that maybe my demise was for the best, but no, I see that I was wrong.

I craved more than brains. I've craved more for over four months. I've brooded, thinking about what devious action I could do to take back what is mine. Then, it came as a pariah.

THIS SITE IS MINE! I RECHRISTEN IT IN THE NAME OF THE UNDEAD! ZOMBIE GENERATION IS BORN! JOIN THE LEGION OF THE UNDEAD! JOIN THE DATABASE OF THE UNDEAD! WE WILL RULE THE DAY AND NIGHT! TOGETHER, WE WILL FEAST UPON THE SOULS OF THE LIVING! IT STARTS WITH YOU, MIKE FOX! DOWN WITH YOU!

From beyond the grave, keep it on the database of the dead.


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Comments
 
Let me be the first to join the legion of the undead.  I myself have a score to settle with this Mike Fox you speak of.  Let us feast on his brains and gorge on his flesh!!!!  Wink
 
Bbbbrrrraaaaaiiinnnnsss.....BBraaaiiinnns.....bra--Oooh, coffee!

*gulp*

What were we talking about?
 
Zombie generation?  What possible video game could come back from the dead to -


AAAHHHHHHH!!!!!  Xbox 360s EVERYWHERE!!!  THERE'S......SO........MANY!!!.......RUN!!

*Camera zooms in on millions of red rings, staring back into the night*

But you were dead.  You all were dead.  And the next one.  And next one.  NOOOoooo

*runs to safety, looks around, breathes heavy, yellow-light-of-dead-PS3-jumps-out-of-nowhere-and-spits-killer-blu-rays-it-no-longer-plays into camera*

*cue black fadeout*
 
I will join the legion!
 
Attention zombies: I will gladly trade my neighbors brains for a Famicom and games. Come and get 'em while they are hot!
 
Ahh April 1st, always the most fun time to be at RFG!
 
BOOMER!
 
BRAINZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
I was a little bummed when the horde first overwhelmed me but then I figured, hey... at least I didn't turn into a damn vampire!
 
One thing is for certain: there is no stopping them; the zombies will soon be here. And I for one welcome our new zombie overlords. Id like to remind them that as a trusted forum personality, I can be helpful in rounding up others to toil in their underground human caves.
 
I'm currently holding off the zombies with my trusty NES Zapper, but I don't know how much longer I can hold out.
 
BRAINSSSSSS
 
As always, April 1st on RFG is funnier than ever!

Now, where can I join this Legion of the Undead? Sounds....tasty.
 
Yummy, Brains!
 
NES Zapper? Screw that...I'll dual-wield a Menacer and Super Scope, with a Phaser in my pocket.
 
This sucks. Why the hell would you change the site from videogames to zombies? What the hell man? I think I'm seriously done with this site.
 
@yassassass: LMAO Cheesy
 
@yassassass:....you do realize what today is right?
 
@yassassass: Goodbye, mortal.
 
I'll be glad when the site is back to normal.  I cant read this shit!
 
Looking around for gnome  to carry through the hordes to earn a bloody achievement.  If I can't find the gnome I'll have to carry gannon around to shield me from the undead.
 
Oh well, I think I'll just submit and join the zombie coalition.  There's no resisting those who who cannot die.  Smiley

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This is where my thoughts go and are never heard from again.

Well, maybe not, but this is the repository for all of my published thoughts and rantings. It'll make my day if you find at least 10% of it amusing and enjoyable to read.


Sorry for the other 90%.

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