Cincinnati:
When the swollen Ohio River floods again, and the ÂÂÂ
Rats are making lifeboats of aluminum siding,
I'll watch it on TV and say to my friends ÂÂÂ
I lived there once, in Cincinnati, and it was not so bad.
Gets a lot of bad press, Cincinnati,
What with the censorship and the grandmother busted for feeding parking meters and
The retarded man with the brick shot down and Marge Schott praising
The Nazis and the burning crosses at the unfinished Underground Railroad
Museum and the birthplace of the KKK right down the street, ÂÂÂ
In addition to that of President Taft, and who's to say
What is art but the people who have to live near it anyway?
Some people call it a cesspool, others the most livable of cities.
I say appreciate it for what it is, there
They wear white, gingham dresses, and spit politely, and sell soaps
Which make everything clean.
Fuck the animals anyway. Inject them, proctor and gamble them, ÂÂÂ
Radiate them, like the indigent people at University Hospital, ÂÂÂ
Massive doses of radiation, fuck them, ÂÂÂ
They were poor anyway, the doctors
Knew what would happen, ÂÂÂ
But they tested anyway and ÂÂÂ
Why yes, they do die. ÂÂÂ
Fuck them, go ahead now, ÂÂÂ
Test all the new drugs on them, at Phoenix Labs, it always rises
To the top, you need to spit to breathe there, yes we have
Chiquita bananas. Fuck Honduras anyway. I'll never let them say that
You were not my friend, Cincinnati, let me count the ways
Scratch that. It's all relative and the flies, surprisingly,
Are not so bad in Cincinnati, they respect the scents of
Rotten yogurt peach schnapps moist pork and pollen, they ÂÂÂ
Respect those smells, and they've learned to stay away
It's not like shit, Cincinnati. ÂÂÂ
Look, to everyone around I'll say, look, it's better than LA
The cops won't shoot you there, if you're white
And the Rainman was filmed there and they've
Got good ice cream at a place called Graeters and
I don't understand but
Some people like the Chili, which is made with Chocolate, and I spent
Three years of my life there and it was not so bad there
Three years of my life there
It was not so bad there
Are hills there and there and there and there is a river and
Aisles and aisles of good cheap bourbon across the bridge there and there is
Nothing wrong with preserving an island if you are an islander there
Is nothing wrong with judging if you are a judge
It's not your home, Cincinnati, so you don't understand it.
People born and died there
People died and were born there
Just leave it alone to grow, the mold count is high but
You can live there, if you need to, ÂÂÂ
It's most livable, if you live there.
I lived there once, in Cincinnati, and it was not so bad.
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